The Confession  One Shot Entry Week 13 Contest
by MommaMinion40
Summary: What if Sookie fell apart in Rhodes and she actually went to Eric? What if she did what she thought she could not do and confessed her love for him? Would it have been worth it? Would her confession bring out his true feelings?


"**I never said it would be easy, I said it would be worth it." **

**THE CONFESSION.**

_**My submission for Suki59 contest Week 13 "I never said it would be easy, I said it would be worth it" Thanks to my wonderful beta sassyvampmama for getting this back to me so quickly. Everything right about this is all her… if there is a mistake it is mine. HUGS**_

_**What if Sookie fell apart in Rhodes and instead of hiding in a stairwell she actually went to Eric? What if she did what she thought she could not do and confessed her love for him? Would it have been worth it? What would have happened, what could have changed? Would her confession bring out his true feelings?**_

**SPOV**

I stood there crying in the stairwell as I tried to figure out what I wanted; what I needed. I needed Eric and even though he had just saved me from Andre, I still felt like that ship had sailed long ago. The night he forgot he loved me, the night he regained the memories of his life but lost our time together. I sat on the stairs for a very long time before I started for my hotel room, dreading what, or better yet, who I would find. I knew without question that Quinn would be waiting there for me.

Quinn… I knew that I didn't love Quinn. I also knew that he was merely a knee-jerk reaction to loosing Eric the way I did. I missed Eric so much, and now I could feel him swimming around my head and heart. God, this was torture - to be able to feel him and not hold him.

I closed my eyes, leaned against the stairwell and just immersed myself in his emotions. He felt confused, lost and grieved. While I was grateful Eric had offered himself to bond with me instead of Andre; I was sure at first that it was because he wanted more power over me. I wasn't so sure right now judging by the feelings that were pouring over me through our newly created bond. I was grateful to him none the less. I was almost to my door when I decided I needed to see him. I turned around and walked back to the stairs and headed up to Eric's room instead.

I walked slowly to the door and knocked but it was not Eric who answered, it was Pam instead.

"Sookie, what happened to you? You look like death warmed over, and why do you smell so heavily of my maker?" she rambled at me with that damn smirk on her face.

"Pam, when Eric first made you did he pull you aside and teach you to smirk like him or is it like that weird thing where dogs become more like their masters over long periods of time?" I snapped. I was just that damn tired.

"Well, someone feels froggy." She smiled a fangy smile before asking, "Seriously my telepathic friend, what has you so out of sorts?"

"I had to 'bond', whatever in the hell that is, myself to Eric or Andre earlier tonight. That part was really a no brainer, but I have no idea what it means or how to feel other than confused. Pam, I just feel so lost and alone." I felt a tear slip down my face as she looked shocked,

"Eric offered to bond himself to you? And Andre didn't suggest it, first? ...mmm interesting." she asked with Eric's raised eyebrow. She very uncharacteristically helped me sit down on the corner of the bed as I continued with my story.

"Yes, he just pulled Andre away from me and offered to do it instead. I am very grateful he did…" I felt my voice shake as I remembered the safety I immediately felt the moment Eric took me in his arms. I just needed a moment, so I took a deep breath before I continued,

"I can't go back to my room 'cause Quinn's there. He barged in at the end of it all and I'm just not up for that conversation. Pam, may I please stay here just for a little while?" I begged. She looked reluctant but as the tears continued to fall down my face she surprised me again and sat down beside me and put her arm around me.

"Of course, here is a key in case you need to leave." She then attempted to make me laugh by saying,

"You think you have it bad? I have to go help the douche sell his vampire wares down in the conference area. Bill Compton is an Asshat! How you ever had sex with that I do not know. He has moobies for god sake Sookie!" I smiled as I asked,

"Moobies, what are moobies?"

"Man boobies." she said with a raised eyebrow like I should have known but as she turned to go she added,

"Eric called a few moments ago to say that he has business to attend to and he will be gone until almost dawn so you will have the room to yourself. You actually saved me a trip to your room. He wanted me to bring you here and have you wait for him. He has something to discuss with you. It's probably to do with all this drama you have caused us. You are so much fun Sookie." She smiled and patted me on the head before she spoke once more very seriously,

"You know Sookie you should tell Eric what happened between you when he stayed with you. Not the half truth you told him, but the whole truth of it all. I think if you tell him it will make you both feel better. It will explain to him why he feels the things he feels and why you hold him at arm's length."

I could hardly believe what she said or that she had gathered as much as she had just by seeing Eric and I together when he had amnesia. She knew…she had known all along that we had loved each other and had said nothing. I thought about telling him everything and it just seemed too hard, what if he laughed or worse pitied me.

"I can't Pam. It would just be too hard." was my reply as I felt a new crop of tears.

"I not saying it will be easy, what I am saying is that it will be worth it." And with that she left me alone with my own thoughts.

I lay down on the bed and cried as I just rested for several hours. The bed smelled like Eric and it brought me comfort to just breathe in his scent even if he wasn't there to hold me. It was around 4am when I decided to leave and I headed down stairs to get something to eat. I just was not up for the conversation that I knew he wanted to have and I knew that made me a coward. I knew that I had gone upstairs to talk to Eric, but I lost my courage. I was tired of being strong. I wanted to be weak. So I did what was easy for me I ran.

I sat alone as I ate in a dark corner. You could not see me from any angle in the diner unless you were right beside me so I sat in relative seclusion. I had my shields up all day and my head ached from it so I lowered them figuring there were so few people in here I could handle the flow. Everything was nice and easy until I heard my name in someone else's mind. It was Quinn,

'_She will never forgive me when she finds out, but I have to protect Frannie and this deal will do that. If Eric had just not come out of nowhere and bonded with her it would already be over. She would be bonded to Andre and she would be his, not Eric's. God she is going to hate me when I have to take her. I will probably have to knock her out. Damn it I don't want to hurt her, I swear I could love her, but Frannie and mom would never be safe and this will keep them safe….'_ His thoughts went on and on like that. How he planned to kidnapped and take me away from Eric. How Andre would bond with me and make me his pet. How Andre really didn't want me he just wanted Sophie Anne to be safe and he thought having me at their beck and call would do just that.

I slipped slowly out of the booth and out toward the street. I had twenty dollars in my purse and no idea what to do. I walked to a park; sat down and tried not to fall apart. I watched the sunrise. I thought about all the people I had loved and lost; my parents, Aunt Linda, Hadley, Gran and then of course, I thought about Eric. He may not have been dead, well finally dead, but our love and the life we could have had was gone; dead and gone.

I love him so much, but he had barely spared me a glace for months on end and then he came to my rescue and bonds with me. What the hell was that? I can feel him now buzzing around my head and my heart. He is very irritated about something and then just as suddenly full of love and happiness. That was weird because the sun just rose and he should be at rest, and just like that as soon as I thought that, his feelings were lost to me. I just sat there in the park trying to decide what to do. All I knew for sure was that I just could not fight anymore; I had no fight left in me. Just then, from out of nowhere, I had a surge of strength - it was my love for Eric; I had to save Eric that was all that mattered. Just like Pam said, "It might not be easy, but it would be worth it."

**EPOV**

"What do you mean no one knows where she is?" I barked into the phone. I had spent most of the night securing her future safety. I made deals and called in every favor I had. Russell and Bart liked Sookie, and so did Stan, they had been easy to convince to help me should the need arise. After learning what information I had gathered tonight, the need was going to arise before the next 24 hours were up. Then the stupid Were I had assigned to watch my Sookie, had lost her moments ago from the downstairs diner. I should have never left her alone, but I thought she was safe in my room and then she just bolted. I should have expected that from her. I had felt her confusion and emotional termoil so I should have known she would bolt. I listened as he continued to make excuses and I finally had enough.

"If she has one hair of her head harmed because of your incompetence, I will have your head on a platter you worthless wolf!" I slammed the phone down and briefly thought of racing out to search for her, but the dawn was rapidly approaching and I could not. I wondered where she was and if I would be in time to save her tomorrow night. My last thoughts of the night were of her and how much I loved her. I remembered our bonding and the moment I had tasted her sweet blood as she pulled my blood into her mouth I had remembered everything. If I were to be honest right then, the emotion I felt was anger I was mad. I was mad at her, at myself and the world.

We had been robbed of so much time, but my last thought was a memory of her lying by a fire and she smiled up at me with her eyes full of love. It was my fault that she felt she had to protect her little heart and not come to me. I had never told her the truth or gave her any indication of my true feelings for her. I had always simply asked her to yield to me, to give me sex and for a woman like Sookie that is not enough. That was my last thought, and as the sun pulled me under I prayed, 'let me be in time, let me be in time'.

**SPOV**

As I made my way back to the hotel to save Eric I became more and more afraid. I didn't think that Sophie Anne would let Andre kill Eric, but the thought of losing him in that way was unbearable. I used the freight elevator up to Eric's floor which thank God was on the other side of the hotel from my room and from Sophie Anne's suite. I was pleasantly surprised that there were no guards on the floor. I guess Sheriff's don't rate the same security as the royals. I used the key to the room that Pam had given me the night before and snuck into the room. I sat for what seemed like hours just watching Eric sleep. God he was so beautiful just lying there.

I remembered every word he had ever spoken to me. I remembered every touch, especially the ones he had given while he was cursed. I finally broke. I cried for everything we had lost. I stripped down to my panties, and climbed in bed with Eric. I wanted to feel his skin against mine one last time. He would probably be furious with me when he woke and found me here or just want sex, but I would cross or burn that bridge when I came to it. Yes if I was lucky he would wake and want sex. I would be an easy screw for him but I could pretend that he loved me one last time. I slept in his arms for hours.

I woke up around 4 in the afternoon and went to the bathroom, drank some water and used Eric's mouthwash. I remembered laughing the first time I saw mouthwash in his private bathroom at Fangtasia and the memory made me smile for a brief moment. I climbed back in bed with Eric and clung to him. I was sure this was the last time I would ever get to hold him. When he woke I would warn him and then he would leave me, so this would likely be last time I would ever be in his arms. With that in mind, I decided I was going to remember everything, every moment. I lost it again and began to weep. I was sobbing so hard I was gasping for air and I couldn't breathe. I was begging him to remember me and to tell me he loved me. I was so afraid and lost, but then suddenly I was not clinging to Eric so much as I was being held. He was stroking my hair and allowed me my breakdown.

**EPOV **

I awoke to absolute heaven. My Sookie was in my arms, but she was sobbing. She was full of fear and sadness as she shook in my arms. I did not attempt to shush her. I held her and gently stroked her hair as I let her cry. I remember this helped her when her brother had gone missing. I had held her then too and just let her weep as I was doing now. She clung to me and dug her nails into my back. She was whimpering 'please' over and over before she went silent and shook with terror and fear. She shook for a long time before looking at me and saying,

"I'm so scared and we're in danger. I feel so alone…I miss you. Eric I'm… so… sorry." She sobbed each word out as if she was in pain just from speaking and clung to me as I spoke softly to her,

"You're safe little one, you're safe…What are you sorry for little one? What do you think you have done?" I prodded gently.

"Quinn. I am sorry I threw him in your face. I missed you and I was so lonely. I know it wasn't right and I would even feel bad about the way I treated him if he wasn't such a bad person." she admitted.

I now knew that her being so scared had something to do with Quinn. She must have found out he was in league with Andre. So I asked her about being afraid as I continued to stroke her hair.

"Sookie why are you scared? What is frightening you so?" I soon found out I was right as she confirmed what I had found out earlier.

"Andre is paying Quinn to kidnap me and I am pretty sure they are going to hurt you. Andre is mad you bonded with me. He wanted me for himself so he can keep Sophie Anne safe. I am afraid that he is going to hurt you or kill you. That is the only reason I came back to the hotel to warn you. I was actually at a park and I was going to call Jason to come get me but I knew I couldn't leave you." She hiccupped and cried some more.

"Why Sookie, why could you not leave me and why did you say you missed me?" I had to hear her say it. I had longed for those words for so long as she drew in a deep breath she sobbed out her confession,

"Because I lied to you, it wasn't just sex when you stayed with me, Eric you loved me and I loved you. You gave me a love that was so perfect and pure. I will always be grateful for that. That at the very least and even if it was only for a little while I got to feel what real love is…." She began to sob as she talked and I could only make out parts of it,

"You said I was beautiful….never leave me…you'd never abandon…but you did…and now I'm all alone and I need you. I am so tired and I can't be strong anymore. I need you to remember me… remember us." Before I could react to tell her I remembered everything and that I would love her and so much more she looked at me and begged,

"Please, lie to me Eric, please lie! Just hold me, tell me you love me and that you are MY Eric. Oh God please just give me one more time before they take me. OH please…." Her pleas had turned into a whimper.

"Sookie, look at me." I said and she shook her head no.

"Sookie, why won't you look at me?"

"Just say it Eric, I can't bear to look at your face while you say it." She bawled.

"Sookie, what do you think I am going to say or do?" I asked with no idea what she thought was going on but though our bond I felt her sadness and terror.

"You're going to throw me away like before." she whispered with a sob that wrenched her entire body.

"No, Sookie I am not. Look at me." I pleaded. She looked up at me with the saddest eyes and I felt my dead heart break as I continued,

"Sookie, I love you." I smiled and she pulled against me even closer and whispered,

"Thank you, oh God thank you." She said as she clung to me as she rubbed her face on my chest and neck. It was then I realized that she thought I was lying to her. She thought I was giving her the lie. One more night to remember before I gave her over to monsters, God what had it done to her when I abandoned her?

"NO, Sookie look at me in my eyes. Look at me. Lover, look at me." I used her pet name and that got her attention quickly. She looked up into my eyes and searched my face.

"Eric? Eric is it you? Baby…MY Eric?" she grabbed my face with her hands and wept. She was kissing my face and holding me very tight as she began to speak again,

"I love you. Oh God, please Eric, don't ever leave me again. Oh God, what are we going to do? You are in danger we need to get you out of here. I love you." She was an emotional basket case but I knew just what to do to calm her. I took her face in my hands and kissed her deeply.

"Sookie, you may wake me like this any time you wish. I love finding you naked in my bed. Oh Lover it has been too long, all the other things can wait, right now I wish to love you, my bonded, my lover."

I kissed her face and held her. I gently and quickly relieved her of her little lacy panties as I rocked her gently in my arms. I kissed her behind her ear as I tried to remember all the little things I knew that she loved for me to do. I touched her with a softness that I had never used with another. She moaned and cooed. She rubbed her face into my chest and kissed me there over and over marking me with her scent. I felt her trembling in my arms.

"Lover, why are you trembling? Are you afraid? This is real Sookie. I am not leaving you again. I am here. I am here." I said tenderly.

"Eric, I can feel you. I am trembling because it is all so overwhelming. I had no idea you loved me this much. I mean, I knew it was love, but this, what I feel is so much more. I feel like I am going to drown in the emotion of it all." she explained as she kissed me and held my face in her tiny hands.

We continued to kiss each other and as it deepened our hands began to roam over each other's bodies. As she began to stroke me she whispered,

"I missed this. I missed touching you. I love the weight of you in my hands. I love feeling how hard I make you." she babbled as she continued to bring me pleasure. I reached between her legs and just held her sex in my hand. My possessive side came out as I said,

"Mine, this is mine. You are mine. Oh Sookie you are soaking wet." She was rubbing her core into my hand and only whispered,

"Please…"

I rubbed the tiny bundle of nerves with the flat of my finger and she continued to squirm as she stroked me.

"Turn like this Lover, I want to kiss you and you kiss me too." I murmured as I turn her sex to my face and kissed those tiny nerves as if they were her mouth. She took what she could of me in her mouth and the rest she continued to work with her hand as she rubbed my balls with her other hand.

"Oh Sookie, yes, that is so good. Sookie, cum for me; I want to taste you please." I begged before going back down on her and doubling my efforts to bring her to completion. I felt her body quake with pleasure and when her cum hit my lips it drove me over the edge and I came too. I pulled her back up on the pillows and wiped her mouth with my hand. She was still recovering from her orgasm when I pushed into her. I could tell by the tightness she had not been that sexually active with the Tiger and while that pleased me I still hated the idea that he had used her the same way Compton had.

I pulled myself from that dark place as I looked down into her sweet eyes. They were filled with love and happiness just like I had remembered her looking at me by the fireplace in her home when I stayed with her. She raised her hands to my hair and pulled me down for a kiss. I could taste myself on her lips and it filled me with desire. I thrust into harder and harder all the while being careful not to push her too far.

"Yes, Eric that feels so good. Stay all the way inside of me for a moment just STAY. RIGHT. THERE." she begged and I conceded to her wishes. I held myself perfectly still as she writhed on me. She was coming again. I watched her face it was full of ecstasy and delight. She was almost there when she yelled,

"NOW Eric, fuck right NOW!" I thrust into her hard and fast. I could hear her screaming and I knew that I was as well but I could not make out any of our words. We reached our completions at almost the same time and I knew that she was now clinging to me again much as she had earlier. I held her and stroked her hair while we both tried to regain our composure. I pulled her on top of me and settled her on my chest. I kissed the top of her head and wondered how I had made it this long without her.

"Eric, we have to get out of here. I love you and I won't lose you or be taken from you. We have to get Pam and get out of here." she advised me. She was so sure I was taken by surprise by all this but I was not. And I am Eric Northman, so of course I had a plan.

"Sookie, I am well aware of Andre and the Tigers plan. I already had you under surveillance but you slipped away this morning right before dawn. I was so worried but you came back for me. You came back to save me. You are so brave, so beautiful and so loyal. I love you so much. I loved you before the curse. Sookie, I have been in love with you since Jackson maybe even before." And with that I finally had made my own confession.

She looked shocked for a moment before slapping my arm and punching me in the chest. Not the reactions I was hoping for, but I could feel her love for me through the bond so I waited to see what she was going to say.

"YOU HIGH-HANDED JERK! I was so miserable without you! All this Quinn crap is mostly your fault you realize that right? If you had just come to me and told me I would have NEVER even went out with him! I would have NEVER chosen him over you! I thought you were just trying to mark your territory that night, I NEVER thought you cared. How was I supposed to know you loved me? You have been so cold and distant for close to a year. WHY?" she had fresh tears in her eyes as I began to speak,

"I was afraid, for the first time in a thousand years, I was afraid. I was scared of what I felt and it confused me. I am sorry I chased you into the Tigers arms. I am sorry I broke all my promises to you…" my voice shook for the first time in centuries and I knew my own tears now threatened to fall, "I am sorry I blackmailed you…hurt your little arm, oh Sookie, I hurt your little arm. I don't deserve your love, but God help me I love you and I need you." I damn near cried as I stroked her shoulder where I had hurt her long ago while trying to bully her into telling me of our time together. She looked shocked and then she threw her arms around my neck and whispered,

"It is okay baby, I love you and I am not innocent in all this. I should have told you. There were so many times I wanted to tell you. I was afraid you would laugh at or pity me" she cooed.

"When Sookie, when did you want to tell me." I wanted to see if some of her times of weakness were mine as well.

"One time was when I asked you for help for Sam. You danced with me and you asked me something and I almost said 'You said that you loved me and you promised you'd never leave me.' Then another time was at the apartment when you had saved me from Mickey. The night you came after Charles tried to kill me and you said 'it would hurt you if I died 'and the last time was the night of the meeting about coming here to the summit. It was getting hard to be in the same room with you and not be in your arms, but I was so sure you would laugh at me. You were so cold. I doubted what I was feeling. I am so sorry I did not come to you." She confessed.

"As am I lover, those were all times I almost broke as well. We are too prideful and stubborn for our own good." I smiled happily for the first time in a year now that we had finally confessed our true feelings I knew that there was nothing we could not overcome together. It was also then that Pam had finally had enough, who was in the adjoining suite, had enough.

"Well good, I am glad you two are finally on the same page. Can we PLEASE go kill the bad vampires now?" she bellowed.

"ERIC?" Sookie shrieked. "How long has she been in there?" and before I could answer Pam did.

"Let's see…I think I awoke to 'ERIC, right there oh God Yes! ERIC!' do you require more of a play by play or can I please go kill things now?" Pam was enjoying this far too much as she continued,

"So Sookie, was it worth it?"

"Yes Pam, it was worth it." she said cryptically with a bashful little smile as Pam laughed. It was obvious to me that they had had a conversation in my absence last night as Pam laughed out,

"I told you so, my telepathic friend." Pam continued to laugh and make Sookie blush so I called out,

"Pamela, you will wait quietly for Sookie and me to dress. Then we will go kill some bad vampires and one very bad kitty, if I cannot find another way around it. No one will harm my bonded." I was Eric Northman after all!

~~~~~~~~ the end ~~~~~~~~


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